Hamlet…Act 5, Scene 1

“Alas poor Yorick, I knew him well.”

Beautiful Shakespearean verse, right?

Wrong. Butchery!!!

It’s is the most misquoted line in literature.

The line actually goes…

“Alas poor Yorick, I knew him Horatio….”


It reminds me of how poorly golf cliches are tossed around in the wrong way. The driving range is like a game show.

Regular-Me (host)


“Widen the arc.”

(Family Feud buzzer goes off)

Incorrect, thanks for playing, what do we have for our contestant Don Pardo?

Monte…our contestant will be plagued by a disconnected golf swing with erratic ball striking.

Thank you Don, the correct answer is actually maintain the width of the arc. Maintain.

“Hold the Lag”

(Family Feud buzzer goes off)

I’m sorry, that is also incorrect, Don Pardo, what’s the consolation prize?

Well Monte, we have a steep downswing and periodic bouts of the shanks.

Thanks Don, the answer we were looking for is sustain the lag…Sustain. In order to win the trip to the season opening Tournament of Champions in Hawaii, we need a good transition and proper pivot (turn) to sustain the lag. Yanking the handle to increase lag and the totally ineffective, holding the lag, doesn’t even get you the year’s supply of Carnuba Wax, or a kiss from Richard Dawson.

Dang!!!! I was hoping to win the $10,000 David Leadbetter experience. I should have answered torn shoulder labrum from whacking the yellow impact bag.

I guess I just have to go on listening to Johnny Miller for proper swing understanding. I hope Seppuku is behind door #3. Don?




  1. RBIm Developer

    “Good Morning!” said Bilbo, and he meant it. The sun was shining, and the grass was very green. But Gandalf looked at him from under long bushy eyebrows that stuck out further than the brim of his shady hat.

    “What do you mean?” he said. “Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?”

    “All of them at once,” said Bilbo. “And a very fine morning for a pipe of tobacco out of doors, into the bargain.”

    A swing guru appears – Run your fools! Gandalf with a face of terror.

  2. Bob Saunders

    Wow. The quality of responses here has just taken some giant leaps forward!

  3. woody

    Thanks for the heads-up. Now I gotta go work on my pronation, or supination…or that thing that Dustin Johnson does with his hands.

  4. Wally

    Whatever you work on, make sure it’s yours, not an imitation of someone else

  5. IPM

    Best. Post. Ever.

  6. Calvin

    Dang. If I widen the arc and hold the lag I can’t
    keep my arms attached to my body.

  7. HoldTheLag


    • woody

      Cheer up. Sustain is the same as hold.

      One definition of “sustain: to keep from giving way.”

      One definition of “hold: to bear, sustain…”

  8. Law

    Spot on with this write-up, I truly believe this website needs far more thing to consider. I’ll apt to be once again to learn far more, thanks for which information.


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Share This