Jim Furyk is ruining the game for all of us

Actually, it’s not all his fault. Ben Crane gets some of the blame too and it’s not all their fault.

There are thousands of dorks out there that think they have to copy whatever the players on the PGA Tour do and it literally only takes one guy taking himself too seriously to create a 5 or 6 hour round for everyone. Walking golf shouldn’t take more than 4 hours and cart golf should take 3 1/2. When I was in junior golf in the 80’s, we were playing for college scholarships and there would be fist fights if it took more than 3 1/2 hours and we were carrying our own bags.

Anyway, Jim addresses the ball, backs off, looks at it again, hikes up his pants, addresses it again, takes a practice stroke, then parks over it for 10 minutes…

Do you know what is being said in the group behind and and by his playing partners?

“HEY JIM, PULL THE TRIGGER!!!!!!!!”

Bad golf is not what causes slow play. Bad and medium golf combined with a 3 minute, scratch, pre-shot routine is what causes slow play.

Golfers have been inundated by information on the Golf Channel and golf publications that make them think they need a long routine, they need to sick to it even over 2 foot putts and they need a 14 step setup and swing checklist.

You’ve seen it. Wait till the group is off the green when the guy in front of you is 240 out. Step off the yardage twice to make sure it’s 242 and not 241. Stand behind it and line up like Nicklaus, march into position, grind on the grip one hand at a time, get the perfect setup, look at the hole…and A PRACTICE SWING with the perfect scratch, PGA Tour, reverse “C” finish and hold!. Then, one foot at a time step into address position, grind on the grip one hand at a time look at the hole, waggle and make a half back swing while watching the club to make sure it is hitting the perfect positions. Look at the hole, waggle, half back swing, look at the hole, waggle, half back swing…then look at the ball, slump the shoulders and freeze. 5 seconds…10 seconds…15 seconds…finally they hit the ball and they top it 23 yards only to start this routine all over again, not forgetting to step off the yardage as it might take a different club to not come close to reaching the green…and this repeats all the way up to grinding on that 18 inch putt for a 9.

This is why rounds of golf at your local course are measured with a calender instead of a clock. My unofficial results are that it is taking an hour longer to play a given course since The Golf Channel came on air in 1995.

My advice to all of the slow golfers out there (and you know who you are) is the more you think and the slower you play, the higher you will shoot and the less fun you will have. All of this grinding is not fun for you, nor is it fun for the hundreds of people playing behind you that want to finish the round before global warming kills us all.

So…

PULL THE TRIGGER!!!!!!!!!!!

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6 Comments

  1. Tony Kim

    Amen! This is why some of the very nice public courses we have in LA are unplayable.

    Reply
  2. Eli

    Add J.B. Holmes and Kevin Na to PGA Tour offenders of slow play. Not only does it make the game less fun for spectators, but it sets a bad example to amateurs who think it’s OK to take forever over a shot if they see some of the world’s best players doing the same thing.

    Reply
    • Monte Scheinblum

      You are exactly right. The other day I saw someone reading greens like Camilo Villegas. I took the time to to go make fun of that person.

      Reply
  3. BruinMel

    It couldn’t have been me imitating Villegas. I wouldn’t have been able to get up.

    MEL

    Reply
    • Shakey Focus Lou

      Heck, you couldn’t get down in that position without splitting your trousers!

      Reply
  4. k gal

    Jealousy

    Reply

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